second post for the day. amidst all the JOY & CELEBRATION for cedar's annual track & field meet, i'm still feeling down. way down; down there. i have no idea why i feel stupidd either.
ARICA. i can't believe she's just going like that. 1, 2, 3 *POOF! there she goes. somewhere i can't bring her back... its all too sudden. i can't bring myself to believe she's really going. how can you just leave us like that?! don't go. i will miss you a lot. A LOT A LOT A LOT. don't give me this chance to miss you. it isn't right. i won't believe. i can't. i refuse. you're such a great pal. i can't bear to see you go. 25th. 5pm. gone forever. without a trace. its this horrbile nightmare i'm in. *PINCH! oww. it hurts. i wish i could just stop time for you. darn. how can you. don't leave us. in this werld there is real and make believe. for me to think you won't go, i must be in lalaland. i can't take the pressure. i'll just freak out. tmr just you see those cuts at my wrists. argh.
some people are just so good at hiding their feelings. maybe. just maybe - i am one of them. i can't help it. i'm masking myself. behind this mask of happiness. i think its doing me more harm than good. darn. i don't even know what i'm typing anymore...
cause deep down there, there's somethingno one understands.
all messed up;
5:31 PM
elyssa
cedar 11sep91
t&f xiaomeii
theminizoo
squirrel yellow-ed random!